I know I've made that known, but maybe not so blunt- like. I say appear because I'm one of those "organized mess" kind of people most of the time. And if I were alone (without children and possibly a husband) in a house or apartment that I like, I'd keep it (mostly) clean. And decorated perty.
So I guess it's depending on your definition....or maybe not. Maybe I'm talking myself out of my confession. Either way, it's really getting to bother me. So I looked up "homemaking" on Pintrest today to see if anything would jump out at me.
Conclusion: A) I must not be the only one, judging by the amount of pins. B) I can't follow someone else's plan to a T. That goes against my being as much as buying a $200 pair of jeans. Unrealistic.
I would take a picture to
Problem: A) Even though others seem to struggle as well (on Pintrest), I never seem to know them. What I see vs. what I live in = humiliation. B) I have some pretty lofty goals considering I'm starting from pretty far down, and I expect it tomorrow. This = failure.
Encouragement: A) A good homemaker keeps a home that the residents feel comfortable in. The majority of our residents are clueless and mostly think I'm fantastic. They are completely comfortable to the point of inviting friends to play Monopoly in the basement surrounded by dirty laundry, dead bugs, and markers that are missing lids.
However, I am not comfortable here at all. And I'm assuming my husband isn't either, but he is polite enough to keep that to himself. And if Ellie were here she would definitely have a problem with pretty much everything about this house. But she's not so the majority is almost overwhelming.
B) I've been challenged to live in peace. God's will is that we would live in perfect peace- not because we are perfect, but because we trust Him. I've also been challenged to die daily to myself and take up my cross. I usually picture that cross as saving the world, but I guess it may mean folding the laundry. Anyway, I have found that turning my days over to God brings complete peace. (Except for a few minutes before lunch today).
After some serious thoughts and discussions with God (while doing the dishes), I have decided to officially do something about this instead of making excuses and dealing. But I'm gonna have to do it the Wendi way (with the inspiration of the Holy Spirit).
So left-brained type A's, I'm sorry. I may lose you.
I kinda feel like an artist going through different "periods".
Most recently, I started my own "Faith Project", where I have pondered what I believe and how I believe this will lead my life. Now I think pondering may be slowed down. The Faith Project still remains because I realize that I need a lot of work, so the outcomes are taking longer than expected. So my new project is within a project.
I think I'll name it The Home Project. This is the start of an "action period".
I promise I'll take my time. Nothing will be accomplished in a week. This is huge.
And for the sake of not making this too long, I will stop for now........