Monday, January 24, 2011

Something Is Different Today

Something is different today

Yesterday I felt lacking,
Today I feel no need.
I was inadequate in my skills,
Now every task bears sufficiency.
I hope it's for good.

Yesterday I was ugly,
Today I am clothed in beauty.
Maybe you can't see it,
But I am adorned exquisitely!
Please don't go away.

Yesterday I took on the impossible
Today I deliver with grace.
I fumbled with overwhelming expectations,
Becoming a seasoned servant.
Remind me of this daily.

Yesterday I was searching,
Today blessings found me!
I have worked to find purpose,
So that I can work for my purpose.
Keep me from falling.

If I have tasted such peace,
I will gaurd it with my life.
My will I gladly give,
If this is my return.
Praise God.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Happy Moments

Brooke wanted to stay up late and do math tonight. I love it.

I love how special she feels when we are alone together.
I love seeing her work.
I love learning her learning.
I love to look at her.
I love it when she tries to make me laugh.

She did a LOT of math. And when she was yawning and thinking slower, she said, "I want to do one more easy one." But too much of a good thing - even math - is just too much.

Max started crying when Daddy started the vacuum.

Not because he was scared, but because he wanted to vacuum.

I love learning his preferences.
I love how he looks when he is proud of himself.
I love watching Daddy patiently guide his vacuuming.
I love "getting" what he is trying to say.
I love it when he is happy.

Summer put on her Princess dress, lifted up her hair, and asked me to tie it for her.
"You tie it tighter than we do."

I love how she compliments others.
I love how elegant she makes herself look.
I love her questions.
I love how she wants to be kissed.
I love kissing her chubby cheeks.

Savannah runs to the kitchen and instructs her sisters on the experiment she wants to try.

I love how inquisitive she is.
I love that she loves to read.
I love how she is learning to lead.
I love how she takes care of the others.
I love, love, love my time learning and talking with her.

There are many frustrating moments as well, but these were the happy moments with my children today.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011


I'm not sure why, but I was thinking about feedback that a preceptor gave me in college. She called me "methodical". I was confused, because I thought she said "mythodical". Later I understood what she meant.

I have spent hours trying to figure out what was it about me that made her think I was methodical, and why did my instructor say that with such interest? Is it weird to be methodical? Or did she not believer her?

I am methodical in how I do things. I really think them through, and most of the time I like my tasks to have a solid purpose- and sometimes two at once. I want order, everything to have it's place. When I work, I want to dot my I's and cross my T's. It annoys some people. I am completely anal as a dietitian. Most of us are :). I love schedules and policies that keep me in line. At work, I am super duper productive, because I am super duper methodical.

However, when I looked up "methodical", these were the similar adjectives listed: orderly, planned, ordered, structured, regular, disciplined, organized, efficient, precise, neat, deliberate, tidy, systematic, meticulous, painstaking, businesslike, well-regulated .

Bahaaa haaa haaa!

And these were the antonyms: confused, disordered, disorderly, random, casual, chaotic, irregular, haphazard, unmethodical.

That's more like it.

My theory is that I am so methodical that in a calm environment I thrive. In a chaotic environment I drown. Mostly because I am so busy planning how to do things, I don't get to the doing- at least not in the way I had planned.
4 loud kids, stuff everywhere, 20 things to do at once, I'm too fat, lost keys, ADD, spilled milk, dirty diaper, no clean forks, should I work out?, ice cream sounds good, did they learn enough today? I'm exhausted.
Several years ago, we took a spiritual gifts test in church. My top 3 included "mercy" and "prophecy",
Mercy: A heart to care for and encourage those who are not able to care for themselves and whom no one else would care for. Knowing who to help and when to help.

Prophecy: The God-given ability to receive a message from God to edify, exhort and comfort the Body of Christ or a believer. To speak the Truth as moved by the Holy Spirit. Most prophesying statements do not contain predictions about the future.

The pastor concluded that one person would never have both of these giftings as their strongest, because one is compassionate while the other is speaking truth, which is convicting. hmmm. Did I do it wrong?

I see myself going back and forth, frustrated with someone, then full of compassion. Tough love, then turning the other cheek. I am so confused.

I love the city, I love the country. I want to be unique, but I don't want to draw attention to myself. I  love people, but struggle with pursuing friendships.

I am an oxymoron. But in the midst of my confusion, something is working. I'm going to have to give this all to God again, because if I do that, maybe I'll stop trying to figure it all out and just get something done.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011


When I started this blog, I was thinking about ways to learn at home that were sort of natural lessons. Like games and chores and things that just happen in a day that can be turned into lessons. That is the way I operate best.

But then I found out that I really like writing, I started spilling my guts over thoughts brewing during the day. My camera is not an option right now which makes the kids activities a little less fun to blog on. But I was thinking about the things I love that I tend to hone in on during the day. These are my passions.

1) God. At times I've tried to tone down my faith because I'm sure there are those rolling eyes at me, but I love God. I am nothing without my faith, and it always comes back to God. I am equally unpassionate about fake religious people so I feel kinda torn when I say "Christianity", because some that call themselves Christians are my brothers and sisters that I love dearly and some are not that at all. In many cases, that has confused people around me. I don't like getting into religious bandwagons, I just love God because He loves me.

2) Creativity. Writing, painting, drawing, designing, acting, teaching (absolutely!), sharpies, stickers, or really cute picture boxes. Seeing things from a new- or at least less viewed point of view. I love to see what creative people come up with! I love to see God's creativity in people!

3) Food. Is there anything more interesting than food? Not just for eating but food involves growing, producing, preparing, serving, tasting, and metabolizing. I love each of those areas of food! Everybody needs food, and most people enjoy it as well. Food is amazing.

4) Children. From what I have witnessed in my 33 (and a half) years is that the childhood period is so very important and sets each individual on a path that is very difficult to leave as they age. Eating habits, social behaviors, character, priorities, world views, and self worth are some of the many aspects of a life that are branded into an individual early on. That is why children tug at my heart more than any other social group. They are the most innocent yet the most vulnerable. And after childhood is over, it is difficult to work with one who was not at least pointed in the right direction. We need to reach them during childhood.

5) Nature. Just look outside (even in the suburbs) and you will see something interesting to look at. It could be a beautiful landscape job with a variety of shrubs and flowers, the ever changing sky, a winter tree with nests left behind, a snowflake, a rainbow, or even the most interesting part of nature...people. Even ugly people are beautiful once you look into their soul. If you don't awe over nature, I challenge you to look deeper- into the center of a blooming flower, at the variety of creepy crawly bugs, the changing colors in the sky, the sounds of the dawn, the arrangement of seeds in a melon, or the story behind a face.

These are my passions. My passions= my posts, which, in turn, fuel my passions. Thanks for reading.

Friday, January 7, 2011

How To Teach

Like I know.

But on Wednesday nights our church is presenting Bruce Wilkinson's Seven Laws of the Learner. It was only the first night, but it sparked a few thoughts.

In summary, some teachers just cover the material, but this lesson says,"If the student didn't learn, then the teacher didn't teach."

Very interesting. Who were your favorite teachers? What were they like?

Mine was in college, but he was not a professor. I remember experimenting with the fastest ways to prep a green pepper. He wore a T-shirt that said "Do you have change for my paradigm?" on the day that we learned about paradigm shifts. I learned about Baldridge, which my current employer constantly is applying for. He definitely didn't just cover the material, he had unique ways of presenting concepts, and he was invested in both his students and his employers. I can't remember his name. "Mr. P" is what we called him. But I remember his class.

On Wednesday, I walked away thinking I had a lot of growing to do in this area. I also had a few affirmations. We studied the meanings of the words "teach" and "learn", and they are basically the same words. Teaching is "to cause to learn". And I thought,

1) My best teaching moments are when I am learning. I don't know enough to be called an expert in anything, but I do know how to find things out. We find things out together.

2) Their best learning moments are when they are teaching. Sometimes I play dumb or sometimes I have them learn on their own and then tell me what they've learned. Maybe they write a book about it or try to teach it to each other. That's when I know they've got it.

This is what I have to work on:
Great teachers serve. Just like great wives, great moms, great friends, etc. During my silent tantrum today, I was thinking how this whole marriage/kid thing really doesn't benefit me but I'm stuck. I'm growing old faster, have less money for myself, uglier, dumber, and have to work much harder since I decided a family would be nice. Poor me. That was when I was focused on myself. However, once I repented and remembered self-centered thoughts lead to misery (and ate some frozen custard), What joy I had watching the children do their math and then tucked them into bed!

Being served does not bring joy, but joy comes from serving others. That's my chiastic structure for today. Hopefully I can continue to remember this. I really don't know how to teach, but this foundational lesson might just make a huge impact on this little academy!

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Back In The Swing of Things

I started off my day (well, after dressing everyone, breakfast, and piling into the car) with studying Esther. This has to be one of the best stories ever told. It's not overly spiritual...more like behind the scenes mighty but subtle acts of God... I can relate. Well, minus being a queen and all the parties and the threat of death....but I can relate to the behind the scenes mighty but subtle acts of God. You can find it in the Bible. In the book, Esther.

It is so beautiful when you have been going through a super tough patch and something happens that leaves you stunned, unable to move because it is the most wonderful, romantic thing anyone has ever done for you...and it was God that did it. I'm not crazy, and if you don't believe in God I can't explain it to you. But I can't deny what I've learned from the lover of my soul.

Here I go again...I didn't mean to get on bunny trails. This study goes in depth about the history and writing of Esther.

We came home and ate burritos, then I took a nap while the girls wrote stories.

We went to gymnastics. Always a good time.

And finally, we went home, ate, drank hot chocolate, read fairy tales, and got ready for bed.

Max loves this book.
He likes to flip open the eggs at the end and say "NO" and "yes". Then he giggles hard, takes a deep breath, and does it again.

He also likes this one:

You can listen to the song here

Sandra Boynton is a genius.

I think we're back in a routine. Back in the swing of things.

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Good Reasons to Drink Milk

We did some fun things today.

I returned my milk jars so I had some cash in my pocket and decided to blow it at Half Price Books. In the meantime I thought, how novel (no pun intended). The more milk we drink, the more book money we have.
If they read 15 books I'll buy them a new one, or something like that. It's healthier than Book-it.

Savannah has decided to take it upon herself to do one experiment a day. I told her that was fine but she needed to be responsible for gathering materials. Today we drew with crayons on a hard boiled egg and soaked it in vinegar. The vinegar eats away at the naked shell but leaves the part we drew on, because it combines with the calcium in the shell. The wax protects the shell from the chemical reaction. I told her we'd try that with a chicken bone sometime to demonstrate the calcium in it as well. I have read that the vinegar makes it rubbery.

Another good reason to drink milk- to keep your bones strong. Completely unplanned, but it fit together in a round-about way.

I'm already tired! Thank God my kids are creative!

Monday, January 3, 2011

Oh, January 3!

Here it is. The Monday after New Year's Day. I couldn't put school off any longer- I feel so lazy. But I had no plan. Until tonight.

I had a few moments of organization so I took advantage of it. I filled up that calendar.

Swimming at the YMCA


Ernie Miller Nature


And the much anticipated Kansas Day Celebration in Newton.

We might enter a writing contest as well. Savannah is super excited.

I asked them what they wanted to learn about, and they said butterflies. We have talked about butterflies so much already...but they wanted more. I might go ahead and order some caterpillars since we haven't done that yet.

I'd like to do so much more but I always think I have more time than I really do.
Now I am half way prepared...maybe even over-prepared let's see what happens!

Sunday, January 2, 2011


I'm just itching to make some resolutions. 2010 was an incredible year for me personally.

I realize most people don't think resolutions work, and I agree. But we have to start somewhere, right? And what I have realized is that what is on our heart to do starts with a thought..sometimes a random, sudden thought that sometimes turns into something huge. I have ignored those thoughts in the past but they come back over and over so I might as well do something about it.

If you read my blog often, you know I can't do much without help. Last year taught me that's okay, I still need to shoot for the moon. Well, maybe not the moon. My goals need to be measurable and attainable. There are only 24 hours in a day. Here we go:

I need to make exercising a priority, starting with twice a week. More would be better. Let's start with twice.

Maintain a clean house. Make a schedule and stick to it! Do things when they need to be done.

Get up before the kids and enjoy some alone time reading, praying and planning.

Read, write, and draw on most days...let's start with four.

Update my menu and stick to it.

Get published, one way or another.

Budget. And follow it.

Try to look good. I know, not measurable. I just feel good when I think I look good.

Drink my 8 glasses of water a day.

Treat others like they are royalty, to the best of my ability, even when I don't feel like it.

Treat God like he is my best friend, because He is. The last two are not measurable, more of a mindset. I don't want to make it a religion, just a way of life.

I'll pray over this and leave the rest up to God. Bring it on!