This is for all you Moms that think you've messed up today. Can you beat this?
After taking the girls shopping for a jewelry box, and spending 25 minutes mulling over decorative boxes because my middle girl never can make up her mind immediately, getting home way too late and throwing some freshly purchased frozen pizzas in my filthy oven, and trying to pacify my hungry toddler for just a few more minutes, I asked my oldest two to pick up a game of dominoes (one of their Christmas presents).
Mind you, my living room is still piled high with presents and suitcases full of stuff to be put away. I have made progress, bit by bit, but not too much while my children are stirring. A few minutes later I ask my little angel if the dominoes are put away and she cheerfully responds that they were.
A bit more of time had passed when I was trying to organize some clothes, the kids were jumping on the bed (loudly) and I almost tripped over the tin box of dominoes that had been picked up, but without a lid and still in the middle of the floor. I snapped.
I kicked the box against the wall, dominoes flying, and started screaming. I picked them up and thew them in the trash, ordering them to either start picking up or go to bed without supper. Brookie, being her stubborn self, marched off to bed. Summer was petrified and stunned. She was too busy trying to figure out what went wrong to obey my threat. I sent her off to bed. Savannah said she left her watch in the car, which was parked in the garage, and did not find it the first two times I sent her to search for it. Meanwhile, I was screaming, throwing things, out of my mind mad. Max, my little partner in crime, mimicked my emotions and yelled right along with me.
Summer peeked out of her room. She had finally found a few words to say. In her seemingly fake sobs, she said, "Mom.......sniff, sniff,...I....I don't really feel loved right now....." oh no, child. I was furious. "YOU don't feel loved right now? What about ME? You completely ignored me when I told you to clean! I just bought you a jewelery box that took 25 figgin minutes to pick out and you don't feel loved? GET BACK IN THERE AND DON'T SAY ANYTHING TO ME UNLESS YOU ARE APOLOGIZING!"
I return to the trash can to retrieve the dominoes. They were a gift and I really couldn't throw them away. Savannah announced to me that she could not find the watch and I yelled, "well, you better ask God to help you because you are going to find it TONIGHT!" As I angrily dig through the coffee grinds, I hear her sweet prayer. Not more that two minutes later she's back with the watch. She then proceeds to give me a hug and says she's sorry for not listening.
About five minutes later, Summer did the same, followed by Brooke. They joined Max with pizza and giggles and more hugs than I deserved. At one point, I had to redirect Summer to eat at the table. She smiled, sat down, and "Mom, you aren't going to be pest again, are you?" Pest?....hmmmm. Oh, my. Yes, I said the "p" word and she caught it, sort of.
I love my family. We are all so very imperfect, but these children just don't seem to know what a grudge is. I never cease to learn from their innocent giggles and hugs, even immediately after a throw down. They frustrate me to no end...until their child like love takes over and fills me with more joy that one would think was possible. I love it that we all can talk about our failures and frustrations to learn from and in turn love...even more.