I love the "guys". I am no feminist. Life would be terrible without men.
It's a few days after Valentines, and I was reflecting this holiday's past.
Like in the High School years when I kinda would want a balloon or a flower or something just because it was nice to be liked, but really didn't want to receive anything because there was no one in particular that was that special to me, and then it would just be awkward. If High School isn't confusing, frustrating, terrifying enough....Valentine's Day can put you over the edge....until I came home and received a rose from my first Valentine, Dad.
In my "continuing education" years I don't recall an actual romantic valentine's date. If there was one I guess it wasn't memorable. I did, however, have guardian angels that came to me in the form of my guy friends. Even though I did not have any romantic relationships with these wonderful men, I loved them. It was great to have friends that cared for me that I could trust and helped me to realize I didn't need a boyfriend to be happy. I know there were a few times one of these knights in shining armor would rescue me from a Valentine's full of feeling sorry for myself.
I studied in Spain one summer, and the girls in my class would joke about having a "Latin lover". I never got one of those. Instead, I got a Laotian lover, which is quite different but more my style. He showed up to my apartment one May evening with mutual friends. Though he was not a Christian at the time, something about him told me God had a plan for him. He was someone special. I found ways to get to know him more and he made it easy for me cause he like me too. ;) He sincerely converted with little to no persuasion on my part and proposed a year and some months later. I knew it was coming so I had to decide if I would say "yes" or "no". I liked him so much that I knew my mind could not possibly make a rational choice. I just prayed that if I shouldn't that God would stop me because I will be saying yes to the proposal. The wedding continued as planned.
Since then I've love him, hated him, cussed at him, kissed him, had 4 children with him, and have grown to trust and respect him. No one can make my day like him. He doesn't give me flowers. That's okay, I'll go get myself flowers. He gives me love, support, hugs, smiles, he brings home a paycheck so I can care for the family, gives me confidence that he will never leave me, and he loves me for who I am.
My kids know they are loved. He dates the girls, he is their first Valentine.
He is not perfect. So, when he can't be everything I need, I turn to Jesus, the lover of my soul. If Sook is at work, Jesus is there. If Sook has no clue what to do with his hormonal wife, Jesus is there. God willing, Sook will be my Valentine forever. However, I am confident that if he is not, Jesus will be my everything I need. I am so blessed by the men in my life, and my Jesus.
And one more thought....
I pray each of my children have wisdom, character, and opportunity to find the love of their lives if it is God's will, but I also want them to know when there is no one else, there is always Jesus. He is the only one we can put our full confidence in!