House of Grace

The Bible talks about the mysteries of God. Sounds so...unattainable at first read. I was thrilled, however, when I realized that much of what God teaches are mysteries because our natural mind does not think like God's. In fact, the way God thinks is usually opposite of how I think in the natural. It is attainable, however, when we learn to look at the world through his perspective.

When we watch how God works through our life experiences, the common theme is how off we are, yet His great love remains.

Man cannot draw out a road map of how to live the perfect life. It can only come through the faith that God knows what is best for us. However, there is obedience, humility, perseverance, patience, and certain action involved as well. And these things are all mixed up in a mysterious jumble with love as an umbrella over all.

I reflected this last week over how I can encourage my children to do their best for God in any situation. I was reminded that criticism hinders creativity and induces fear, often times.

Yet, a standard needs to be set. We should strive for perfection without being perfectionists. So hard.

One mystery that pays many times over is grace. Undeserved favor.

I want my house to be a house of grace. This is one way to pave a life experience that opens the path for Christ to show himself. Not just grace to my own children, but as a part of life.

Show grace to other children.
Show grace to my spouse.
Show grace to neighbors and friends.
Show grace to our leaders.
Show grace to our church.
Show grace to our enemies.
Show grace to those that don't agree with us.
Show grace to family members.
Show grace to your first grade teacher that said you weren't smart.
Show grace to those that belittle you.
Show grace to yourself.

God knows, there are so many times that I have been the one in need of grace, and there are times that I was misunderstood- even with good intentions.There are those that don't understand my circumstances. I have been judged, but I also have received grace that I can't comprehend. I thank God for those that have given it to me.

Thank God for grace.

What I Want My Kids To Know About Love

To: My Children

Love.
The first thought that pops in mind is romantic love. Fairy tales, soul mates, chocolate hearts and first kisses. This is not real love.

Next, maybe kindness? Giving gifts? Service? Some times these are the effects of love, but it is not love.

"All we need is LOVE".... somewhat true. At least it's a nice fuzzy feel good thing to say. True love, however, is not fuzzy.

True love is not always hearts and kisses and skipping in a meadow. True love is ugly at times, incredibly strong, and literally impossible. The quest of possessing complete and perfect love is a noble ambition, but you will fail. Shoot for it anyway. And whenever you begin to stray, remember you have storerooms of love to take and give- not from your own heart, but from God himself. This is the only true love.

If you take on this ambition and if you keep your mind on Christ, you will begin to see what true love asks. It asks of you hugs of joy and tears of unthinkable pain. It asks complete blindness to faults. It demands you to be vulnerable. It asks you to be treated unfairly- and to take it. It asks you to give favor to the ones that deserve it the least. To eat food that isn't pleasant to your tongue. To smell a ghastly stench and keep a smile on your face. To be made a fool of and be kind anyway.

It is not romantic, and sometimes down right miserable.

You cannot give what you don't have, so receive the love God gave. Every last bit. Then fight anything that might try to take it away.

And in the end, you will love having love. The pain will be memories of joy. And you will be victorious.

Love your family. We need each other.
Love your fellow Christians. We are family in the spirit.
Love your friends. Not only when they are friendly or when they benefit you, just love all the time.
Love strangers. Your kindness might change someone.
Love enemies. This is the hardest, but the effects are the greatest. And hate will destroy you.

Finally, don't try to love. It won't work.
God is love, and God is in you, so the love you need you already possess in you. And if you already possess true love:

You are patient. You are kind.

You don't envy and do not brag. You are not proud.

You are polite, and are not selfish.

You have self control, and can give grace to pardon the wrong things done against you.

You are saddened with sin and joyful with truth.

You can persevere through anything without anticipating failure.

You encourage even when it hurts, and don't stop until the end.

Sometimes love is pictured with hearts and kittens. I don't think you can't draw love. It's too mixed up. But one thing I know is it's not for the weak. Weak people will exhibit the opposite of love and call it strength.

You have love, and you are a warrior. If you want anything meaningful from the life, you must accept this blessing.

Not That Different

I've been going through some struggles lately. It's those kind that make me want to turn off the resounding verses of "don't repay evil for evil", or "love those that persecute you". The kind that make you want to be a Christian when it's convenient. When all is well, living the Christian life seems easy. But what Christ has asked of me these last few months went against every grain in my carnal body.

Interestingly enough, it is my children's devotions and lessons that have kept me on course. I mean, it's fitting for them as well but if I am expected to teach them how to give grace, I have to live it. And I do want them to learn it, not only for their sake by mine as well. I don't like refereeing disagreements over who looked at whom wrong, or whom has to be the prince in their play. Getting even just doesn't seem appropriate after that lesson is thrown in my day.

It is easier to see when it is someone else's fight and my emotions are not involved. Petty, childish, fights that cause way more damage than any fulfillment. They have a familiar feel to the fights that my three little girls bring to my world. Whenever I step back and really think, grace always is more attractive. I really don't care what it is- unless your fight has a purpose for the greater good and is more sacrificing than a way to feed your pride. And even then, grace should be involved. Love. Wanting to help the one that hurt you. Exhibiting the love of Christ himself. Tough stuff.

One lesson today was being connected to Jesus- the Vine. Then our fruit (of the spirit) will be healthy. Yes. It wasn't even try really really hard to show me the fruit of the spirit. Muster up the love you need to smile and keep your mouth shut. Write a cheery Facebook post so that everyone will think you have joy. Write a big check and tell God to chalk that one up to kindness. No. The fruit of the spirit is a by product of a relationship with Jesus. And the fruit of the spirit doesn't just get you by- it ensures victory. This victory is not over another person, but over the anger, the unrest, the manipulations, the pride, and the discouragement.

Being close to Jesus does not make dealing with hard situations non existent, but it gives resources to fight the real enemy- which is not a human. If you are filled with the Holy Spirit, you have the fruit of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness, goodness, and self control. Whether you choose to go with your spirit or your flesh is still your choice to choose.

As for me, I know people are watching, wondering how I will respond. People that I really do love and I want them to know how much Jesus loves them. My anger will not show them that, and it may really confuse my kids.

Lesson learned. When my children are fighting, I know what they feel like. I know it is not "nothing" to them. The best way I can calm them down is to remind them how much they are loved- by myself and by God. Then they are in a position to give grace.

And for myself........exactly the same thing.

Favorite

I was just scrolling through my blog and realized that I've been talking a lot about Summer lately.

You would think she is my favorite.

Well, she is.

She is my favorite to go shopping with. She is my favorite to get hugs from. To kiss on the cheek, to cook with, and to dress up real pretty.

But then there's Max, my baby boy. He's my favorite, too. I mean, he's my baby! And he's a boy! He loves to cuddle while watching music videos. He is very opinionated, which is stinkin' cute for a two year old. He really loves having me around. He steals my heart.

Who can top your first-born, though? Savannah is definitely my favorite. Her mind is always churning, thinking of how she will do everything. She wants to learn- we learn together! We are a great team. I could not home school without her. She is a self learner and is turning out to be a great teacher as well. I dread the day she will grow up and leave me.

My heart aches for my niece, Ellie. I long for the day that I can be only 10 minutes away from her instead of 2.5 hours. She remembers everything! She loves to serve, and she remembers the important details for each individual. It's so fun to see her take all her random thoughts and put them together into a meaningful conclusion. Watching her grow is exciting for me. She is my favorite.

However, my life would not be complete without my Brookie Boo. She is the one who cuddles up so nicely on the couch each morning. She gets my day started with her reports about which of her songs were played on Klove during the night. She is off the wall spunk that might just annoy some people. But I am her mother so I find it pure joy. I cherish the look on her face when I say, "Brooke, you are my favorite."

When I consider how much I love each of my children, I am aware that they are not special. Each child is so unique and beautiful. They are treasures, that when allowed, will bless all kinds of different hearts. But it must be allowed and reflected back in order for them to know this about themselves.

I once heard it said that when an adult encounters a child, the child needs to see that adult face light up. Yet it is so easy for me appear unaffected at times. How do my children and other children see themselves through me?

And how often I need to be reminded that we are God's children. Even the people that tick me off, annoy me or hurt me. They are their Father's favorite. You are His favorite. Everyone has value, but it is sometimes hard to see if they are not treated valued. What a tragedy for them not to know. What a crime it is when I make other's feel worthless.

During my oxymoron struggle between mercy and prophesy, love and judgement, I see that people may once and a while be open to loving correction, but judgement mostly turns people away. This is especially true since I am far from perfect myself. An attitude of love, mercy, and grace is the best way to positively influence people- my children, other children, annoying co-workers, and discouraged friends. For they are all God's favorite.

Thanking For...........And Meaning It

I am sure of the fact that I could not be truly usable (not in a superficial I have to do this kind of way) until I have collapsed, relaxed my muscles, loosened my grip, and become mold able for the exact use I was created for.

This leaves me vulnerable. It's scary. It's also scary when I have charge, so I might as well let go.

Afterward, or maybe just before, there is a time of horror visions flashing in front of me of what might happen. I wonder why I take thing for granted yet worry so much at the same time?

But my spirit it there, trying to get my attention. And once I manage to turn my mind over to the peaceful promises of God, the horror visions fade to black. It is all a lie.

It is then, panting in the refuge of these promises (promises that are actually promises), then and only then I can clearly see what I might be without them. This is where my thanksgivings turn into glorious sounds to my Father, due to the pureness of this offering. I see what I have in Him and through Him. I see how I can trust Him, and that He only wants good for me. A good that is as spotless as Jesus Himself.

Half hearted thanksgivings are a muffled clamoring, even if they are belted out in the most beautiful song. God's senses cannot be compared to ours.

But I have to let go and be helped, be vulnerable, and receive before anything beautiful can come from me.

When I am there, in the glory of His promises, I cannot go against the character of God. I have no cares for worldly things. I have no time to look around at what everyone else is doing wrong, because my eyes are fixed on Him. I cannot act for selfish greed because I am completely satisfied.

That is why some "radicals" cannot stop talking about their love, Jesus. That is why some would like everyone to hear their joy. That is why their interests and actions seem odd to those around them. It is all in or not, and the only secure place is "in".

Dear God, Your gifts are more precious than silver, than fine gold. What you have already given me is sweeter than the finest clothes and most luxurious house. Thank you for giving them to me. My prayer is that I will live and stay in these promises, and that I would understand them more and more every day.

Redeeming Moment By Moment

My husband has been very busy lately (good thing). This has reminded me how much I rely on him to help me. "I couldn't reach the insurance agent to cancel our meeting, and I have to leave for work." He said in passing this morning.

I hate it when strangers come into my house. I don't like appointments. And I really dislike being put on the spot.

"You could trust me to handle it for you." was a thought from God.
I said a prayer.

"When is he supposed to be here?"
"Now."

I looked at the clock. 9:00. I looked out the window. A small red car pulled up to my curb. My house looked like a bomb had gone off in it. I ran to brush my teeth. After a bit of confusion, we had to tell him that we needed to reschedule. He graciously agreed.

We needed to be at the dentist at 11:00. I scrambled to get my sleepyheads ready. French toast with a sprinkle of powdered sugar for my children who were forced to eat wherever they could find a place. Max's was on the floor- like a dog. My table was cluttered with paint, brushes, and hardware.

Max started to dance on top of a folded up metal chair I reached down to swat him, and in realizing he was clueless, I powered down to a pat. None the less, he cried.

"Don't take frustrations out on them. Believe that I'll handle it for you."

 I realized Max only had clean purple sweat pants to go with his blue and red shirt. Brooke's outfit was interesting. No one could find matching socks, including me.

"If we had eight legs it would be much harder to find socks." offered Summer.
Very true. At least I only had two feet per person to cover.

We were ready to strap into the car when Max whines to tell me he's pooped. I gave him a mad look and said, "Why do you poop?"

He laughed. "Why do you poop?" he mimicked.
At least he did it before we left, and not during the appointment.

My keys were not in my purse so I ran back upstairs to look for them. Realizing that I'd left my eggs out, I opened the refrigerator door. As I placed the eggs on the shelf I said aloud, "God I need my keys." I shut the door, focused my eyes on the desk across the room and directly on my set of keys.

I got 20 minutes of Klove love on the way to the dentist.

Savannah was incredibly anxious to arrive at the dentist on time. And we did, right on time. There were no cavities, which is very good, especially since I hate appointments. (And it's good that she has healthy teeth.) We had accomplished one thing today. Good.

I needed to be home by 1:00 for another appointment scheduled with people to give me a quote for the bathroom. The line in the Taco Bell drive through was extra slow. We made it home at 1:00. I sent the kids downstairs to eat in the basement and scrambled to clean the bathroom. No one showed up. I checked my phone, and I saw there was a missed call at 11:00. I'm now 99% sure the appointment was 11:00 and I wrote down 1:00.  Another missed appointment.

As the children were eating tacos off the basement floor since the rest of my house left no available spot and I wanted to hide them from the appointment that I thought was going to happen, the bug man came to spray the inside of my house. Including my basement. I didn't know he was coming at all.

This dear man always seems to keep an iron face when my children embarrass me with questions about him within his ear shot. Again, no double takes or raised eyebrows. He treated me like I was normal when I was absolutely convinced I was the worst mother/wife/citizen in the Midwest.

It was about all I could handle. I had to grab ahold of anything good to maintain, at the very least, a moderate temperament in the house.

"I need help, God"
Immediately my eyes fell on these red letters: "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness."

"Believe me when I say I can make it right."

My husband knew my frustration, and obliged to my mysterious requests.

My girlfriend called with good news and refreshing encouragement.

The kids watched a movie.

Sook cleaned the kitchen. He's really good at cleaning.

I didn't lose it. My failures are redeemed. God does that, sometimes through people, sometimes through other stuff. I wouldn't have even written this in order to avoid recalling this painful day except for the fact that I appreciate others sharing their shortcomings so I know I am actually normal. I was starting to pity myself again when I read this blog.

And also to praise God, for he addressed each of my failures and frustrations today. That is what a personal, loving God does, and He doesn't get tired of doing it.

Royal Living

I have so many life thoughts in my head, one post will not cover all of it. I'm running the risk of someone possible taking me wrong- I'm all about balance. Most of the time. In some areas I'm crazy radical- at least compared to my surroundings. So today I'm just talking about one aspect of life. It's a lesson that I really needed to learn.

Accepting gifts, favor, blessings.

Somehow I got it in my head that living without was more righteous. At first, it seemed that I was more self sacrificing and content, because I could live anywhere, in any circumstance. I wasn't picky. This can be a good thing.

However, as my dreams and my family grew, it turned into self pity, bitterness, and jealousy. I got in a huge rut that seemed as if it would never go away. I couldn't bless anyone because I was always in need. I was miserable.

What I didn't know was how to receive blessings. But when I started to humble myself (yes, I need humbling. It takes humility to receive!) and to learn more about who God was and what He wanted to do in my life, I was looking at life through different glasses.

As a follower of Christ, I am saved. I have received salvation.

What is salvation? From my understanding, and according to various sermons and Bible footnotes, "salvation" in Hebrew and Greek means deliverance, safety, preservation, healing, and soundness of mind.

Other words connected to salvation are: justification, redemption, grace, propitiation (the sacrifice of Christ that appeases divine wrath), imputation (transfer of Christ's righteousness to me), forgiveness, and sanctification (set apart, made holy).

Whoa. I hadn't been living like I had all of that. This means, if I am worried about....anything (money, health, safety, my sins) I was not living as though I had received salvation. It's like a pretty gift sitting on a mantel containing value beyond imagination.....unused. Or if you had nothing and was handed an invitation to move into a royal palace and live as one of them. You show your friends and tell them about this wonderful opportunity for you. You carry it around with you wherever you go, put pictures of the Royal Family up on your wall, and collect all kinds of information about what it is like to live in royalty, yet you never actually go.

Maybe you don't know the way. But then again, if you know the awesomeness of this invitation, wouldn't you do everything you can to get there?

Maybe you are scared they won't like what they see. Maybe you don't really believe their guarantee that all un-royalness will be left at the door, and you will be adopted in as pure royalness. No questions asked.

Maybe you are comfortable in your poverty and are scared of leaving it.

Maybe you don't really understand what it means to be royalty.

I am grafted in to God's family. I want to know all of the benefits that go along with that. But it doesn't stop here.

I am finding that God knows me personally- he is the one who created me. He knows the things I love and he knows my shortcomings. He provides perfectly in a way that is tailored to me. My individual needs, loves, joys, gifts, and responsibilities- in accordance with His word. Sometimes it is circumstantial, many times he blesses me through other people.

I am slowly learning what it means to be a part of God's family. Each perfect revelation reminds me that my heavenly father is the perfect provider, and I am more than happy to receive it.

There is more to this story but I'd like to point out that God drew me in by his incredible love. He showed me where I was and then what was waiting for me, upon my acceptance. I pray that my children come to this realization earlier in life than I did.

Here are some verses to ponder:

Genesis 15:3 And he believed in the Lord, and He accounted it to him for righteousness.

2 Peter 1:2-4 Grace and peace be multiplied to you in the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord, as His given power as given to us all things that pertain to life and godliness, through the knowledge of Him who called us by glory and virtue, but which have been given to us exceedingly great and precious promises, that through these you may be partakers of the divine nature, having escaped the corruption that is in the world through lust.

Philippians 4:19 And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 1:3-7 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ. just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He mad us accepted in the Beloved. In Him we have redemption through His blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of His grace.



From: How He Loves (listen to it here)

He is jealous for me.
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy

When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
And I realize just how beautiful you are
And how great your affections are for me.

Oh, How He loves us oh,
Oh, How He loves us,
How He loves us, oh

Giving Grace Wand

I used to work in a kitchen full of women....the DRAMA!

The amount of time spent on feelings hurt and rumors spread could have produced gourmet meals...but instead it was frozen pizzas and sloppy joes, much to my dismay. (Sloppy joes. Slop, slop-py joes...)

Now I have a house full of school aged girls. No different- except that the fights are over what is the best color in the whole wide world and which Poly Pocket girl is the mean one.

AND they have a great imagination. I can work with that.

So, when there is an argument that has no clear cut solution, we give grace.
Or, when someone refuses to work it out, we give grace.

Cause it's no fun to stay mad.
*****************************************************

We have worked on using our words when we are sad or mad to let the offender know what they did. First, we try that. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

"I feel sad because you pulled my hair"
"That's because you stomped on my foot!"

...and then it gets ugly. That's when we give grace (undeserved favor).

******************************************************

Giving grace makes the other person more beautiful, it fills the giver with joy, and it usually melts the anger. (And it makes my job much easier)

This works for my little girls. I have no clue what would work for little boys!

You will need:

A magic wand or a pretend bottle of fairy dust

A believable imagination

So, when I have one mad little girl telling me that her imaginary unicorn really has pink hair but so and so says it's purple and there is no way around it, I say, "Oooooh, I guess you need to give grace!"

If they resist, I ask them if they want to stay mad or go back to playing- usually they make the better choice. If not, they can take some time out and cool down.

And I tell them, "Wave this wand over her head and press the button (which makes a magical noise) and you will drop magic grace sparkles on her head and she will be beautiful because you gave her love when she hurt you."

When she tries it, I say, "WOW! She is so beautiful right now! You are so kind to give her grace!" or something like that. They usually get into it. After a while, they don't need reminders, they just get the wand when they need it.

It has sparked many grace questions, and strengthened the love for one another. Everyone can use a little (or a lota) grace from time to time.

Grace

We have graduated from children's Bible songs to K-Love in the the car.

Sometimes other stations as well, but lately I have craved anything inspirational. Some people don't get this music, but for some people, the words can grab a hold of us and rescue or bless us right where we are at.

Grace is really so beautiful. I cannot describe it better than standing out in a spring rain washing all the muck off of you till it is gone and standing before God as he intended you to be. Righteous.

This evening we were driving in the car and this song came on. Savannah was so excited because she knew it and started singing along. Full volume. Terribly off key.

At first I laughed to myself, but then God reminded me that He is blessed by a child's joyful noise.

I think the irony of this is that her off key praise was a picture of grace itself. We get it wrong so often and beat ourselves up over it but God's grace never ends, and when receive it is when we can truly break free from our mistakes and regrets. And that makes Jesus all the more beautiful to me. It also melts the anger I have toward other people when they get it wrong. God gives us grace and in turn we can give it to others, making them more beautiful. Isn't that what Christ did?

As I pumped gas I told Savannah, "I love the way to praise God". She gave me a dreamy smile and said, "yeah."

Live freely in grace.