Giving Grace Wand

I used to work in a kitchen full of women....the DRAMA!

The amount of time spent on feelings hurt and rumors spread could have produced gourmet meals...but instead it was frozen pizzas and sloppy joes, much to my dismay. (Sloppy joes. Slop, slop-py joes...)

Now I have a house full of school aged girls. No different- except that the fights are over what is the best color in the whole wide world and which Poly Pocket girl is the mean one.

AND they have a great imagination. I can work with that.

So, when there is an argument that has no clear cut solution, we give grace.
Or, when someone refuses to work it out, we give grace.

Cause it's no fun to stay mad.
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We have worked on using our words when we are sad or mad to let the offender know what they did. First, we try that. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't.

"I feel sad because you pulled my hair"
"That's because you stomped on my foot!"

...and then it gets ugly. That's when we give grace (undeserved favor).

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Giving grace makes the other person more beautiful, it fills the giver with joy, and it usually melts the anger. (And it makes my job much easier)

This works for my little girls. I have no clue what would work for little boys!

You will need:

A magic wand or a pretend bottle of fairy dust

A believable imagination

So, when I have one mad little girl telling me that her imaginary unicorn really has pink hair but so and so says it's purple and there is no way around it, I say, "Oooooh, I guess you need to give grace!"

If they resist, I ask them if they want to stay mad or go back to playing- usually they make the better choice. If not, they can take some time out and cool down.

And I tell them, "Wave this wand over her head and press the button (which makes a magical noise) and you will drop magic grace sparkles on her head and she will be beautiful because you gave her love when she hurt you."

When she tries it, I say, "WOW! She is so beautiful right now! You are so kind to give her grace!" or something like that. They usually get into it. After a while, they don't need reminders, they just get the wand when they need it.

It has sparked many grace questions, and strengthened the love for one another. Everyone can use a little (or a lota) grace from time to time.